Friends in shining armor

I have this hang up that rears its ugly head from time to time. I kind of picture it as one of those dragons from medieval times, but smaller with mangy hair like a mutt. It's plain ugly and I am never glad to see it. Unfortunately, it seems to show up during  times of stress, poor eating habits, and large gatherings. Enter the holidays.

Yesterday I was with a good friend, and although my mangy mutt thing seems to have settled down, it's still breathing. As she and I talked I shared my hang up. When I was finished, my friend simply said, "Jessica, that's vanity. Why are you letting yourself do that?"

Whoa. That is not the way things are usually done. Didn't she read the new edition Christian-ese manual to friendship? She was supposed to smile understandingly, say very benign things, and delicately walk the line between validation and agreement. If she felt led, she could have also neatly tied it all up with an, "I'll be praying for you." Instead she picked up her sword and simply called my dragon out. I was calling it a hang up, an insecurity; my friend called it by name. She called it sin and with her declaration I could almost hear the mangy thing yelp and run away with tail tucked. My friend risked my anger and went to war.

This type of friend has become very rare. Think about it. When was the last time someone simply told you you were wrong. Not only has this become rare, it has become condemned. We label it judgmental when someone actually has the nerve to call our sin out. Funny thing is, when my friend spoke up it made me healthier. She was right, and it made me feel free.

Somehow we have forgotten that sin is harmful to us; even the B list ones like gossip, being rude to the lady behind the counter,  and just plain snottiness hurt us. They make us less than what we were created to be.  Wouldn't a real friend want us to be our healthiest, to be whole?

So here is my question and my point; do you have a warrior friend?  Do you have someone in your life who will strap on their armor, look you straight in the eye and stab you right in the front? My friend had no way of knowing if I would welcome her words or if I would get offended and take the side of my sin. Such a friend is rare; such a friend is a blessing straight from God. After all, as iron sharpens iron, so one friend sharpens another (Prov. 27:17). Faithful are the wounds of a friend (Prov 27:6).

On a similar note, does your love for your friends and your love for your God give you the the courage and character to graciously speak up when your friends are being pulled astray by their own dragons? Do you stay silent as they lose the battle or do you pick up your sword on their behalf?

I need this kind of friend. I'm getting to old for anything else. In fact, if you are a close friend of mine consider this an open invitation, a call to arms of sorts. For those of you who only know me through a computer screen I encourage you to call on your own friends. If you'd like, forward this to them, tell them you love them and you'd like to pick up your sword. Then ask them to fight for you.

A well known Ecclesiastes passage states, "One can be overpowered, but two can offer a defense." Again, I ask, "Do you have this type of friend?" If not, please go find one. You need the defense. We all do.